The Undertaking of Adam Novak Read online

  “Look, it's been a long day and it isn’t even over yet. I'll call Jordyn later, okay?”

  “Yeah, sure. See you tomorrow?”

  “I'll stop by when I can.”

  The line goes dead.

  Irene pulls the phone away from her ear and looks at the screen. CALL ENDED.

  “Well, goodbye to you too, moron!”

  11

  ADAM

  I end the call before Irene can say more. I know she doesn’t care about what happened to Tianna and that she doesn’t understand my wanting to stay with the guys.

  Irene has only one brother whom she has not seen in nearly twenty years, so she doesn’t have that family bonding and the notion of what family means.

  I place my hands on the steering wheel, resting my forehead there and start to cry. Slow and quiet at first and then completely out of control. The tears pour out of me and I can’t contain the flood of emotions. She’s gone. Forever. I’ll never see her beautiful face again or hear her contagious laugh. And Aaron? God, Aaron. His mom is everything to him. They have no idea that they are my reason; they keep me going only by knowing they exist. I will never leave Aaron. I could never.

  I close my eyes and all I want is to have Tianna back. She was so beautiful. God, it’s not easy to say ‘was.’ She had a smile that was one in a million, and her eyes. Those beautiful brown eyes lit up every time she talked about her boy. The sobbing subsides and I lift my head, then wipe at the tears with my arm before taking a deep breath. I start the engine, pull out of the parking lot and drive back with a headache.

  –

  I take the route Tianna and I used to take when we walked home for school. That was one of the highlights of my day, walking with her, talking about everything. She told me she wanted to be a teacher and I told her I wanted to be a truck driver. She said she wanted to travel the world and I told her that I’d go with her. First, we’d go to California and see the ocean and make our way along the coast up to Canada. In the end, she became a drama teacher and I made it to California, without her.

  When mom and dad were alive, the house was full of activity; birthdays and holidays were a big deal, especially after Aaron was born when he became the life of the house. As time went by, and after Irene came into the picture, things changed. She never got along with my family and it broke my heart that I allowed her to dictate how I spent my time with them.

  –

  Jaycob is sitting on the chair by the door, his eyes swollen and raw. I close the door and throw the keys on a table, then remove my jacket and toss it on the sofa. I stand in front of him and place a hand on his shoulder. He looks so lost and I have no idea how to help him. I need to give him something to do before he loses his mind.

  “Can you help me with something?”

  He looks up at me with hope in his eyes. “Yes, anything.”

  “I need to find her documents. You know, the uh… life insurance policy, her social security card, driver’s license and anything else you can find. I’ve no idea where I can find this and being in her room doesn’t feel right. You’re more familiar with this place. Can you do that?”

  “Of course,” he says. He gets to his feet and hesitates for a moment then takes with him the luggage Tianna had left by the door; a pink rolling suitcase and a Transformers duffle bag. She’d left everything ready for the trip. With a sigh, I go to check on Aaron.

  I knock on his door and when he doesn’t respond I step inside to find him curled up on the bed, sleeping. From the closet, I take a blanket and place it over him and notice he’s holding onto a photo, the one of her taken for the school yearbook. I sit in a nearby chair and watch him sleep for a moment.

  My thoughts are all over the place and I need to figure out what to do next, but I know for certain that Aaron is my priority. I’ll have to talk to Irene about it, but I don’t think she’ll object if I were to take him home with me. We have a spare bedroom and maybe we can discuss a possible adoption. We can sell the house and Jaycob can find a small place. I get to my feet and bend down to kiss Aaron’s head. “I love you, buddy.”

  –

  “Any luck?” I ask Jaycob who is on his knees with a shoebox in front of him.

  “I got her bank info. They may be able to tell you about her credit cards too. And I did find the policy, but no luck with the social security card and ID.”

  He closes the box, returns it to its place under the bed and gives me whatever information he collected.

  “Did you check her bag?”

  “Not yet. Didn’t think of it, actually. Thanks, Jake. I’ll check later.”

  He nods and sits on the floor with his back against the bed hugging his legs close to his chest. He buries his face in them and weeps and my heart breaks for my little brother.

  I kneel in front of him and put my hands on his shoulders. He cries so hard his whole body trembles and I pull him into my chest, wrapping my arms around him. He holds me while he sobs into my shoulder.

  “I’m sorry, Jake,” I whisper.

  “This fucking hurts!”

  “I know it does.”

  We rock back and forth until my tears begin to fall and our cries became one.

  “There’s nothing I can… nothing I can say to ease this pain, Jake, and…” I have no words and we remain that way for a few minutes.

  Once my sobs and tears subside, I say, “I’m so sorry. All I can say is that we should find comfort in each other, and in knowing that one day we’ll see her again.”

  “That’s fucking bullshit!” He pulls away from my embrace, wiping away tears. “That’s some bullshit people say to… to comfort someone.”

  “I know and I’m sorry, Jake. I… I don’t know what else to say.”

  “Then why even bother?” He lets the words hang there a moment before leaving the room. I take a deep breath and exhale before going to the car for Tianna’s bag.

  –

  Jaycob is in the kitchen eating a slice of cold pizza out of the box. I put Tianna’s bag on the table and sit across from him. He offers me a slice, but I decline and proceed to check in Tianna’s bag in search of what I need. He closes the box and sips from an energy drink.

  “Adam.”

  I look up from the bag.

  “I didn't mean to snap. I… I get tired of you looking at me like I'm still a kid.”

  “Jake, I know I'm an asshole sometimes, but… I worry that's all.”

  He takes another sip of the drink. “I know, and I do appreciate you trusting me with Aaron. I’m just so fucking lost right now.”

  I nod and continue looking in the bag. I pull out her wallet and find what I need and place her phone on the table.

  “You should give it to Aaron,” he says, pointing with his chin to the phone.

  “Why?”

  “Because… It was hers. It'll give him something of hers, he can take anywhere. Plus, you can stay in touch with him that way.” Jaycob stands to clear the table and proceeds to wash dishes.

  “What time are you going home?” he asks without looking at me.

  “I'm staying the night.”

  He looks over his shoulder. “Why? You don't trust me?”

  I nearly roll my eyes, but shake my head instead; I’m in the middle of pulling the credit cards out of their sleeves. The silence stretches on for a beat then I say, “I don't want to go home.”

  Satisfied with my answer, he continues with the dishes and remains quiet for a few more seconds.

  “Did you tell Irene?”

  “I did, yes.”

  “How’d she take it?”

  His questions are starting to make me uneasy. “As expected.”

  “What a bitch,” he says, and immediately turns to me. “Sorry.”

  –

  In the living room, after Jaycob is done washing dishes, we sit on the couch and reminisce for a while until I start to get sleepy and then get to my feet.

  “Can I crash on your bed?” I ask.

  “Go ahead.”


  I start to go, but stop and turn back. “Thanks for your help today.”

  12

  IRENE

  The girls come down to the family room to watch a movie, but Irene is in no mood to deal with her daughter—or her friends for that matter—and goes up to her bedroom. She is able, for the moment at least, to get over her anger about Adam not coming home. She has to remind herself that without Tianna everything will be better. The next time she sees Adam—better be soon—she’ll make sure to show him she’s there for him.

  She makes her way to the master bathroom to run a bath. You deserve one after a job well done.

  Feeling optimistic she steps into the tub with a glass of wine and leans back. Everything’s going to be okay now. With Tianna out of the picture and the little bastard soon gone, she and Adam will be okay. Jordyn will be going off to college in a couple of years and then he’ll be all hers. She is sure he’ll focus his attention on her now. She’s not bad looking and she’s sick and tired of Adam rejecting her each time she attempts to get intimate with him. What did he see in Tianna, anyway? She often wonders. This brings Julia to her mind because this is another perfect example. What does Ken see in her? She calls to check on Julia.

  “Yes, Irene?”

  “Hi, Jul!”

  “What happened?”

  “Your brother called, finally.”

  “What did he say?”

  “It's confirmed. The bitch is dead!” she says, chuckling.

  “But, is he suspicious?”

  “Shut up!” Irene hisses.

  “I’m sorry. I’m… so nervous.”

  Irene is losing patience with her sister-in-law and worries that Julia will become a liability. She’s not so sure now that telling Julia about her plan was the best idea, but she had no other choice. Sure, Irene could have worked out a deal with Ken but in the end, it was Julia who convinced Ken to help. Irene has played her cards well; she knows how much Julia despised Tianna and played that to her advantage.

  Before Tianna’s death, when Irene was putting her plan in motion, she spent countless hours poking at Julia and filling her head with lies to reignite her hatred for the woman. Irene is a master manipulator.

  “Relax, we're good.”

  “What about the autopsy? They’re—”

  “Julia! Calm. The fuck. Down. And besides, didn’t Ken tell you that it’s untraceable?”

  “I want to believe you.”

  “You can’t act like this in front of your brother, Jul.”

  “I won't. I’ll avoid him for now. Ken’s taking me with him on his New Mexico trip for the weekend.”

  Irene is surprised to feel a pang of jealousy. She doesn’t have feelings for Ken and their relationship is only physical. They both felt that sexual tension for years until one day, years ago, while Julia was out of town, they had sex. Can you blame her? Adam refuses to touch her—unless he’s drunk—and she has urges. And anyway, Ken is fantastic in the sack.

  “Oh, good. Distraction’s good. And don’t worry; I’ll keep you posted on everything. Oh, and Jul?”

  “Yes?”

  “Make sure to get yourself a beautiful dress for the funeral.”

  “Geez, Irene.”

  13

  ADAM

  The airplane-shape clock on the wall in Jaycob’s room reads 6:07 a.m. I had such a horrible night plagued by terrifying dreams where I see Tianna die over and over and over again and every time I attempt to reach her she slips from my grasp.

  I rub the sleep out of my eyes and look around the room and it only takes me a moment to recall the fact that Tianna is gone.

  I get off the bed with a groan, my back is sore and my head hurts. I walk into the bathroom to wash my face and I don’t like what I see in the mirror. My eyes are puffy from crying and for the first time in a long time I see shadows under them. My hair is a mess, so I run my fingers through it in an attempt to tame it down. My stubble needs a trim, but it can wait.

  I step out of the bathroom and go to Aaron’s room to check on him only to find an empty bed. I go to the living room and find Jaycob crashed out on the sofa, but no Aaron. Panic starts to rise and my chest tightens. I check the kitchen, nothing. I stand in the middle of the living room with my hands on my hips. Where is he? Then I go to Tianna's room and there he is, asleep in her bed. The relief is weakening. I take a deep breath to calm my heart and stand at the threshold. What the hell is wrong with me?

  Aaron is still holding on to Tianna’s photo and he seems so small in the queen size bed. He is small for his age, but somehow he looks smaller now. His caramel skin has lost some of its glow and his brown eyes move under those long lashes. I shake my head and go to the kitchen for coffee.

  –

  I feel like a complete stranger in the house, not knowing where things are, where the clean dishes are supposed to go, where Tianna keeps the pots and pans and cleaning supplies. Those things seem insignificant to think about with everything else that needs to get done. Difficult things. And I have no idea where to start. Staring out of the kitchen window to a clear sky, I make a mental list of what is a priority.

  First on the list is my boss, Charles. I left work early after receiving the call from the hospital and haven’t had the chance to tell him why. Charles and I have been working together for nearly fifteen years. Not only is he my boss, but a great friend.

  Next on the list is Julia, though I am pretty sure Irene has already delivered the news. Next, I’ll check in with Rita and call Jordyn. Tianna and that girl were tight and I know my news is not going to be easy. Unless, of course, Irene has already beaten me to the punch.

  The beeping from the coffee machine takes me out of the trance. I grab a mug and pour myself some coffee, black, and I realize I have not eaten in over twenty-four hours—not that I have much of an appetite—but know I need to be ready for the long day ahead. I open the refrigerator and find eggs and bacon so I decide to make breakfast. As the bacon sizzles in the pan Jaycob walks in, messy hair and swollen eyes.

  “Good morning,” he greets with a yawn and goes to the cupboard for a mug.

  “How’d you sleep?” I ask.

  “I didn't go to sleep until sometime after two, and didn’t even sleep that well.” He takes the pot of coffee to the breakfast bar where I place a pile of cooked bacon on a plate. Jaycob pours coffee, drops in the chair and moves the plate of bacon to the exact center then takes a piece. We are in silence for some time while the sun showers the room with light.

  “I found Aaron sleeping in Tianna’s room,” I say, cracking an egg into the pan.

  Jaycob takes a long swallow of coffee. “Yeah, I know.”

  “He woke up during the night?”

  “Yeah, like at twelve, maybe?” he says, going for another slice of bacon. “He asked if he could sleep there and I said it was okay.”

  “Hey!” I startle him as he’s reaching for a second slice. “Get a plate.”

  With a groan, he goes to get a plate and I put some scrambled eggs on it as he sits.

  “Why didn't you wake me?” I sit across from him.

  “You were out. I mean out. Snoring and all.”

  “I know, but—”

  “He’s fine. I took care of it, okay?”

  I have no idea how to talk to Jaycob. Tianna said that a lot of things frustrate and overwhelm him. She understood him better than anyone, even better than he understands himself so I worry about him without her now.

  “I just...” I trail off. I’m glad he’s stepping up. Aaron means the world to him and I know he’ll always look after him. “Thanks,” I say finally.

  We eat in silence for a few minutes with the humming of the refrigerator as a buffer. I wonder if Jaycob is mentally prepared for the day ahead. He glances at me over the rim of his mug. “You alright?”

  “I don't know, Jake. My head’s still…” I wiggle my finger over my head in lieu of an answer.

  “In a fog,” he offers.

  “Yes. Exac
tly”

  He angles his head and regards me for a moment as if trying to read my thoughts. “You don't have to do it all alone, Adam. Not this time.”

  “I know. Thanks.” I take my plate to the sink as Aaron walks in.

  “Morning, sleepyhead,” greets Jaycob

  “How are you, buddy?”

  He sits on the chair I vacated and says, “Okay. I could eat, though.”

  “Of course,” I say and put a plate with eggs and bacon in front of him.

  “Did you sleep okay, buddy?” I ask Aaron.

  Jaycob starts to clear the dishes and I watch him for a few minutes. He appears a bit frantic and overwhelmed. Change is not easy for him. Even with not much cleaning left, he searches for things to clean or fix things that to him appear out of place and order.

  “I had a dream and mom told me to not be scared,” says Aaron and starts to cry.

  Jaycob goes to him and kneels in front of him and I lean back against the counter, giving them a moment.

  “And she's right,” Jaycob tells him. “We have to be brave and strong. We can do it, right?”

  The boy nods and turns to me to say, “Are you staying here with us?”

  Great question. I ponder this for a moment while he looks at me with a mixture of fear and hope. It’s time to start the planning and sorting of a life without Tianna. I clear my throat and say, “I was thinking that maybe you guys should stay at my house for a few days while we sort things out.”

  Jaycob turns around to face me and I see the fury in his eyes. “Are you kidding?”

  “Just while we sort everything out, Jake.”

  He crosses his arms over his chest, a defiant gesture. “I'm not going.”

  “Jake—”

  “No! What the fuck, man? This is my house.”

  “I know that, but—”

  “What? I'm too young to be on my own? Too fucking stupid or… or… or naïve to take care of Aaron and myself?”

  “Jake—”

  “No, man. Fuck you!” He throws his hands in the air and leaves the kitchen.